As I finished up my last training run for an upcoming fifty mile ultra race, I realized that it has only been nine years since my first run and in July I’ll celebrate the fifth year of my first ultra run.
I didn’t set out with a goal to be a runner and definitely not a crazy ultra runner.
My goal when I began was to become healthier physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
The desire was to stop living a broken life and discover what it means to live a full life.
From Brokenness to Strength
My first run was to the end of the block and back. I was over 250 pounds, my knees shot spasms of pain through my body every step.
Forget the back from the end of the block. I was so out of breath I thought I was having a heart attack.
I lived though and learned to love my short runs. As I did, my physical health became stronger.
Mentally I was broken also. I had fallen back into believing what was said to me often as I grew up. “You’ll never amount to anything” was the regular mantra I heard from everybody around me.
As I began to run more miles, I began to believe I could be something. I believed there was greatness within me and I just had to find it.
Emotionally, I was a broken mess. I was trying to figure out why my wife stayed with such a miserable, angry mess who was constantly breaking things mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
As I ran, there was an outlet for my broken emotions and I was able to listen to my wife and friends again. I became a source of emotional strength for others.
Spiritually, although I identified as a Jesus follower, I was broken inside because I doubted that God cared for me, much less loved me.
As I ran I began to lay my doubts and unbelief down. I realized that Jesus didn’t owe me anything because He had already done it all for me.
Deciding the Second Half Would be Stronger
The year I turned 50 in 2014, I decided that to celebrate the occasion I would run 50 miles on my birthday.
The amount of training I did was tremendous and very difficult. Every week found me in a different city all over the United States. The stressful work of building a start-up company’s sales was endless.
Getting up before dawn to get a good four to six mile run in before I started sales calls was a sacrifice. A serendipity was that I saw more of that city than most of the citizens would as they say in bumper to bumper traffic pursuing the great American Dream.
By the time my birthday arrived on July 3, I had finished multiple weekend runs over 26.2 miles (marathon) and without knowing it had finished my first ultra run of 32 miles.
I began my birthday run at 4 AM with a 19 mile run around my town. I came home, changed clothes and ate a big breakfast and then left after twenty minutes for the hot, punishing part of my run out of the city and onto the country roads.
My parents surprised me by contacting a local reporter who met me at the thirty mile mark and interviewed me for that night’s newscast.
When the reporter asked me why I was doing what I was doing, I’ll never forget what I said.
“Symbolically, the decision to run 50 miles on my 50th birthday is about making the decision to start the second half of my life strong. Finishing this 50 miles will help me realize I’ve been carried out of brokenness to fullness of life.”
Life Is Just Starting
I run with a bunch of friends, all going through life’s challenges and all of us encouraging each other to be more.
We’ve run multiple races together but our best memories are the crazy runs we’ve done together. Nighttime forty mile runs, 50K runs just for fun, 4x4x48 challenges where we’ve run four miles every four hours for forty-eight hours.
Foot problems, health issues, work challenges and all the brokenness involved can’t rob us of living a full life.
Deciding to live life to the full is what it’s all about.
I didn’t decide to start running because I wanted to be a runner.
I started running because I wanted to live.
If you’d like to start living life again.
If the brokenness has drained you and left your dream ship high and dry.
If you think the best years have passed you by.
I have a secret for you. Those are all lies and it’s time to start living again.
If you’re slightly curious, drop me a line and ask me how you can start living again also.